Chapter One
This book has been written throughout from the perspective of confusion. There is an awareness throughout that the person in it (\me\0 is working from the standpoint of confusion - but that there is inherent non confusion at play , buried within the seed. The seed is rooted in the depths of Mind. The circumstances around the seed are the nourishing factors
- and, as the story continues - it may be possible that the germination becomes evident in real time (as accible to you, the reader).
I am not saying that once you reach the end of the story - at a short film called Foolishly Looking Left, Wisely Looking Only Right - that there
w ill be any guarantees. You may even be more confused - but - still - this is the end of the story. if a person chooses to write a story - they have to choose a starting point - and - if the starting point happens to be within the ultimate vacuum - that which occurred a) on planet earth in 2020, and b) that which occurred in planet
Bryant (me) in 2020 - the starting point exists bang in the middle of it all.
The middle of it all is a decription of what it means to be neither here nor there. When John Frusciante sits in his dressing gown, with one knee in the air, holding a cigarette and dropping some of the ash onto the floor of The House in the film Funky Monks - he says “William”. In the film it then cuts to the song Soul to Squeeze. Te way in which ‘the biggest enemy is your ego’ resonated to teenage me - and the way in which that cryptic idea seeded a pathway into a very purposeful direction in exploring it - but via clumsy methods and mistaken road signs - …. In my quite basic altruistic brain - this sat somewhere in songs of innocence. The complications and nuance of the way the world works - and what it means to try and get along within it - with the basic idea of holding this exploration at the heart of existing - had yet to be learnt when deciding to take on board the end part of that statement, from John Frusciante. I expect that everybody at some point, discovers a statement to that effect. The fact that JF was 21 at that age - did not diminish from the fact that - when I would reach similar age - that I would not have the same level of wisdom. Whatever Wisdom JF had - becomes actualised in the amazing twists and turns of what occurs in his life in the next few years. On closer inspection of any person involved in simultaneous artistic and spiritual evolutionary endeavours - it would seem that any wisdom stumbled upon seems to then be tested within an inch of its life - to the point when no doubt can longer be held. The way which this happens could take the form of the first part of JFs statement…..
Around the point in which I began writing what would be enteiened together to make this story - I was discovering the Friends and Enemies part. I considered the idea of enemies to be backward thinking - and ad spent all of my life not recognising anyone as being one. The world as an enemy as Los failed to resonate - and my ingrained positive outlook was always able to flip anything into it having the possibility to be okay. The fundamental goodness of things was always there within difficult situations and difficult people - and holding onto this grain of wisdom - about the idea that the root of all problems was related to Ego - seemed to be a buoyancy aid throughout everything in life. This intriguing exploration - although giving no answers - was interesting enough to give reason for optimism in times of doubt.
Throughout the writing of this book - there became an ctualisation in my mind that the world is full of f and e. My basic naievity, or innocence - or whatever it was - has not even cganhged as the basic building block o this approach - but at some point - it became apparent that the world did not operate on the way that I thought it did. At some point - it starting clicking that I needed to take some note of the situations and characters that were surrounding me - that they were there - as enemies. To not acknowledge them as such - would continue to evolve the life I was in - within a vacuum. It is not possible to evolve within a vacuum. To not recognise the enemies - means that a person cannot evolve those enemies into them being friends. This does not mean that they will become one of the friends you can count of one had - but they can at least become pacified. However - until my eyes were able to open wide enough to begin to be brave enough to see that - enemies were a facet of reality - I was continiuing to remain asleep.
The Hoover Chronc and other stories begins withina certain futility - but this futility honestly acknowledges that I have found myself in a situation which is no longer fruitful. As the time period runs along - from - what it means to weave a story together based on the very real dissolution of the innocence of part of my ways of thinking - plays itself out in real time. There is a parallel story going long. There is the actual presentation of what I deemed originally as ‘entertainment’ - and the medium for doing so was as a Patreon account - an idea suggested to my by Mark Espir. Withi that - can be seen the fulfilment of this original criteria - which I wrote and the introduction to it - back when .
What occurs separate to this - and something which I could it have known would be the case - is the gradua understanding which dawned within my mind of the situation which I I was living through - and the evolution which occurred within that. I believe that - around about the chapter called CD SIngle F - Floridian Gesar - there became a kind of crack in my mind stress - and the idea that this was a Patreon account - (whatever that is supposed to be) - inverted, flipped - or what have you. An unexpected change, within me, accelerated - and it possibly dawned on me that the very process of beggining to make this thing, was having a transformative affect. As such - it started to become (family) clear - that this was a story - and that, a story has an ending. The ending could not be known - until it wa a finished - but an ending had to occur. Within a story - which has a beggining, a middle, and end - there are characters, and there are friends and enemies. This is the human story - and it is the archetypes of the universe in which we inhabit. The simplistic idea that 2your enemy is your ego” - is completely true. \but what dies that mean?
A person does not exist within a vacuum. All stories have friends dn enemies. The degree in which a person is able to evolve into a story, into art - will decide how reality, the universe - is going to use that person. When I answer Mark Espir’s question - that I a going to have to charge a pound a month - and a person will get , a lot of, well - me - really ; I knew that this was a shambolic answer. To present such a barrel of nothing - I was aware, at that time - that this was a confused staring point. It was all I had though. It was all I had - because there was no story. I was not even sure that there was such a thing as a story - because - to some extent - I was living within a vacuum.
Very strangely - in one of the songs from one of the albums which present themselves once I had realised that this Patreon account was going to become a story - states exactly this point - from within the very midsts of being caught in a situation which felt like it wasn’t going anywhere. The album called Activity Halo’s was made right in the deepest point of simultaneously loosing connection with the wider world at larger - and feeling some ins of awakening of something there in my inner world. The fact that the two were divorced - seems to present itself in a lyric which seemed to spring from nowhere - perhaps as a warning to myself - that I needed to look outwards. The song, called The Needle and The Rugged Landscapes Of Vinyl - says . Wnd dont blow, in the vacuum that I’ve made up. I’m realsing I can’t hold on, for fear that I would fall off. “
There are no real friends and enemies in this album - it is very psychological. There was no real storyline - there was a kind of emotional amorphousnous. Nothing had really come into being - and this was the answer to Mark Espir’s question. Mark Espir brought something into being - me this began at the very beggining of Epiosde One of the hoover Chronicles. He brought something into being - by helping e begin an investigation. The beautiful irony of THe Hoover Chroniles itself - is the irony of existence. Throughout the continual snaking of the question - a situation naturally presents itself. Delve deep enough into any situation - and juxtaposition will occur. The answer to working with that juxtaposition - is that it needs to involve other people. I had been able to feel a juxtaposition within my self for years - up until the beggining of this, The Hoover Chroniles and Other Stories - but it remained amorphous - coming and going - like the sentiment found in that song from Actvity Halos. I was writing, re-writing - and scribbling out - my own life.
I had not noticed th existence of enemies - and therefore - had not been able to see the existence of true friends. I had not found strength in my own inherent irritation - and had not actualised anything from that standpoint of ‘THIS IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH!” THE SITUATION IS INTOLERABLE! The clues as to what was going wrong - presented themselves further throughout this parallel stream which ran along alongside simply starting a Patreon account - because Mark Espir suggested it. The actual story of what happened - is there as an almost invisible overlay. I wonder if anyone will see it?
